Vijay For Victory

Treasure is definitely there. Never give up.

A wise man once sat in the audience and cracked a joke.

All laughed like crazy. After a moment he cracked the same joke again and a little less people laughed this time.

He cracked the same joke again and again, when there was no laughter in the crowd, he smiled and said, “When you can’t laugh on the same joke again and again, then why do you keep crying over the same thing over and over again”

‘Learn to move on’…!!!!

Photo credit : Smiling Baby

This is a brilliant way to get happiness. So funny, but it carries the core fact of the life. Not sure who made it; but it is superb!

Learn Mathematics

A little boy was doing his math homework.

He said to himself, ‘Two plus five, that son of a bitch is seven.

Three plus six, that son of a bitch is nine…..’

His mother heard what he was saying and gasped, ‘What are you doing?’

The little boy answered, ‘I’m doing my math homework, Mum.’

‘And this is how your teacher taught you to do it?’ the mother asked

‘Yes,’ he answered.

Infuriated, the mother asked the teacher the next day, ‘What are you teaching my son in math?’

The teacher replied, ‘Right now, we are learning addition.’

The mother asked, ‘And are you teaching them to say two plus two, that son of a bitch is four?’

After the teacher stopped laughing, she answered, ‘What I taught them was,
two plus two, THE SUM OF WHICH, is four.’

Story telling

One day the first grade teacher was reading the story of ‘Chicken Little’ to her class.

She came to the part of the story where Chicken Little tried to warn the farmer. She read, ‘… and so Chicken Little went up to the farmer and said, ‘The sky is falling, the sky is falling!’

The teacher paused then asked the class, ‘And what do you think that farmer said?’

One little girl raised her hand and said, ‘I think he said: ’Holy shit! A talking chicken!”

The teacher was unable to teach for the next 10 minutes.

Image Credit : basheem 

A Spanish teacher was explaining to her class that in Spanish, unlike English, nouns are designated as either masculine or feminine.

‘House’ for instance, is feminine: ‘la casa.’

‘Pencil,’ however, is masculine: ‘el lapiz.’

A student asked, ‘What gender is ‘computer’?’

Instead of giving the answer, the teacher split the class into two groups, male and female, and asked them to decide for themselves whether “computer” should be a masculine or a feminine noun. Each group was asked to give four reasons for its recommendation.

The men’s group decided that ‘computer’ should definitely be of the feminine gender (‘la computadora’), because:

1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic;
2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else;
3. Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long term memory for possible later retrieval;
4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your pay-check on accessories for it.

The women’s group, however, concluded that computers should be Masculine (‘el computador’), because:

1. In order to do anything with them, you have to turn them on;
2. They have a lot of data but still can’t think for themselves;
3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they are the problem;
4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have gotten a better model.

Source: Read somewhere in net

How to behave with your parents when they are old is one of my favourite stories. I just happened to see the video version of this. Hence sharing…

I hope you like this.

One night four college students were playing till late night and could not study for the test which was scheduled for the next day.

In the morning they thought of a plan.

They made themselves look as dirty with grease and dirt. They then went up to the dean and said that they had gone out to a wedding last night and on their return the tire of their car burst and they had to push the car all the way back and that they were in no condition to appear for the test.

So the dean said, they could have the re-test after 3 days.

They thanked him and said that, they would be ready by that time.

On the third day they appeared before the dean. The Dean said that, as this was a Special Condition Test, all four were required to sit in separate classrooms for the test. They all agreed as they had prepared well in the last 3 days.

The Test consisted of 2 questions with a total of 100 Marks.

Click here for the question paper

1) Your Name (2 MARKS)
2) Which tire burst? (98 MARKS)

a) Front Left
b) Front Right
c) Back Left
d) Back Right